Behold! The Magazine MILF of the visual arts! Wangechi Mutu is the gorgeous, supremely talented pregnant chick in Vogue’s “Shape Issue” who crafts incredibly complex feminist collages from magazine cutouts that every collector is on the waitlist to get — market crash, be damned. And now that Mutu’s pregnancy has inspired a self-portrait series of her be-bellyed self, bottom image, I know exactly what I want for my own July push gift. Forget sapphires, Mr. MILF. I’m obsessed with Ms. Mutu’s version of MILFy narcissism. All in the name of supporting the arts, of course.

Adios, glass ceiling! I am salivating over Spain’s new Defense Minister, Carme Chacon. It’s not just her hotness. It’s how she is inspecting troops on her first day — during the third term of her pregnancy! Let’s see The Messiah Barack Obama match that. [NCJW Journal]

Does the Tina Fey cover of Vanity Fair make you happy to be alive, or what? I mean, hitching Tina’s star to Barack Obama’s? And basically giving her credit for his win with a lone cover line — “A New American President! A New American Sweetheart!”? The whole thing makes me want to explode into patriot confetti and craft a flag-pin jacket like the one her co-star Alec Baldwin sported for his September New Yorker profile. Except I’d go neo-Tina sexy style, and wear it only with fishnets, stilettos and some lacy undersomething. OMG. Lightbulb! I think I’ve just dreamed up the perfect after-party outfit for Michelle Obama!

If this is what you get to look like when you sell your soul, marry the devil’s automaton and pull a real-life Rosemary’s baby, I’m thinking Camp Tom Cruise might have been a worthy trade-off for Katie Holmes. She looks freakin’ amazing in T this week!

Now that Alex Kuczynski got a gestational-surrogacy happy ending — a baby, whose creation is affectingly reported for the Sunday Magazine — it seems fair to ask a couple q’s about The Times’s resident rich lady. First — and I warn you, this is a very unpretty thought about the “Beauty Junkies” author — did it ever occur to the self-proclaimed plastic-surgery addict that the constant injecting and sucking might adversely affect her reproductive abilities? (See, I told you it was an ugly thought.) Second, as the inaugural writer of the Critical Shopper column, Kuczynski was refreshingly unabashed about her boom-times spending habits. Since giving up the gig, however, what has happened to Kuczynski’s style? Her black pumps, inset, are like the footwear version of mom jeans. In other words, not acceptable!