Massive thanks to the genius Jena and Team Peniferella for transforming a major blog-platform issue into a gorgeous upgrade. You’re the best, J. Air kisses!

I am going to Stephen Colbert’s my cousin Pete’s boy’s bris tonight! You see, Mr. Colbert claimed full rights to Abraham Carter Grosz — who is the genetic progeny of Pete and his wife — on national television last week. But Pete — a “Colbert Report” writer and the proud papa of Abey baby — is in talks to keep the kid until the mohel completes the Covenant of, ahem, Abraham. After that, I’m told, all bets are off. Such an oy-vay of a situation! (And a serious reminder to read the fine print of your contract!)

How handsome is my friend Brian Phillips on the “Pulse” page of Sunday Styles? Everybody’s favorite fashion and art publicist, Brian was shot for Mike Figgis’s “Soho Essays,” which includes other notables like Derek Lam and Paul Auster, and appears at Milk Gallery through February 7.

When Mr. MILF proposed, he came armed with my great-grandmother’s Art Deco ring and a surprise — a stunning diamond necklace. If the booty was glamorous, the get was anything but. He bought all those carats from a colorless, desk-bound diamond guy housed in a Fort Knox of an office building, which is basically the only way to buy jewelry in New York, unless you want to chance it with the shysters of 47th Street or endure the massive mark-up of tourist traps like Harry Winston. But where is the glamour? Not to mention the convenience, security and curatorial credo?

And where are the women? In this town, everybody’s got a “guy.” Now, you can have two girls. Their names are Amber Berger and Jennifer Ganz, and they are the jewelry-concierge team behind 27 Facets, the best thing to happen to the business since Elizabeth Taylor. All you do is tell them what you want, they bring you a selection, et voila! They do every price point, they do custom, and they know everything and everybody: Amber has worked for Bendel’s, Gucci and Cartier, as well as her family’s jewelry manufacturer, and Jennifer is a gemologist and appraiser. They also happen to be adorable, chic and good friends of mine.

Of course, bling times are done. But consider that an “investment” article of clothing is worth almost zero dollars the moment you buy it, and jewelry starts to sound pretty practical. That’s what I’ve been telling Mr. MILF as we prepare to celebrate our fifth year of wedded bliss this weekend, and I think he is beginning to buy it!

If you have dreamed of fashion greatness, you must read “Violet on the Runway.” If you have experienced self-doubt, you must read “Violet by Design.” And if you have felt burdened by high expectations, you must read “Violet in Private,” the third, just-landed book in this awesome series by Melissa Walker, about a wallflower-
turned-model named Violet Greenfield. Obviously, you have experienced all these things. So, buy the book!

Online, Melissa is doing giveaways galore. On the ground, she’s doing a party for the Michael’s crowd, and the aspiring Michael’s crowd. I’ll be there, and I challenge you to find me out. Suspense!